Doubts

I'm filled with doubts today. I doubt my ability to stay strong and maintain my boundaries with respect to allowing you back into my life as a partner. I know logically as things stand you don't have the capacity to be an appropriate partner for me and quite frankly I don't want a domestic partner anymore. I feel more secure when the only person I have to rely on is myself. It's stressful to have to rely on someone else especially when they have repeatedly proven to be unreliable. I don't want to hold anyone else accountable for anything anymore. Those only person I want to hold accountable for anything is me.
I am however lonely and really want a regular sexual partner. Gawd! I sound like such a dude. Because of my ravenous sexual appetite and your uncanny ability to satisfy it, I'm worried that my hormones will cloud my better judgment. I have to keep you at arms length though, for the sake of my sanity.

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